I’ve read several stories lately detailing people’s frustrations with the way others live that is irksome. This isn’t surprising because people are annoying. Everybody on the planet is annoying. I’m annoying and you’re annoying. Isn’t it grand?

Whenever I read these stories, usually from women seeking affirmation of their point of view, or maybe some advice about how to handle the relationship, I think about responding but rarely do. Mainly the reason I don’t respond is that I try to avoid giving advice whenever possible. I will talk about what I do and I will talk about my experience, but I tend to assume that advice will be unwanted in the end.

Even this is not so much advice, but a sharing of my perspective that will hopefully enlighten someone to another way of seeing their world.

I find in my relationships that more and more my philosophy is to choose the path of least resentment.

What does that mean?

It means that I choose to behave in the way that will lead to harmony and not resentment within myself regardless of anyone else’s opinions or behaviors. What this looks likewill vary from situation to situation and person to person.

Almost always it means acting proactively instead of reactively. I make sure my choices are the best for me and my family and don’t purposely react to others either by doing something or not doing something.

Occasionally it means choosing to not do something if it’s obvious that the other person doesn’t value the action and I don’t think it’s important to do it regardless of their opinion. A good example would be not giving someone a gift if they do not reciprocate or seem to find gift giving to be important.

Other times it means doing something, even if those around find no value in the action, just because I do value it. I will make healthy, delicious food for a party because I want to even if the other guests would be OK with junk food. And, here’s the kicker, I will actively choose to not be annoyed that they don’t care.

Choosing the path of least resentment leads me to harmony with the world, which I need, without actually being in harmony with everyone around me. This is a win-win since I have no control over anybody. I barely have control over myself!

So what do you think? How do you manage to stay at peace in a world filled with conflict? Are there ways you can be at peace within yourself without others agreeing with you or behaving the way you would prefer?

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